Author: Wallevand

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Writing Exercise #3: Halloween Rhymes

This post is approximately 500 words. 

The following verse represents about an hour’s worth of work, which means it’s not highly polished, yet I still managed to work in rhyme and rhythm with minimal effort.

However, if you’ve ever written a verse in rhyme, you know that sometimes it requires a ridiculous commitment to the style. For me, I usually get about three-fourths done before I start to question my decision. It comes around the time I think, “I need a rhyme for itch: ditch, Fitch, hitch, kitsch, liche, Mitch, niche…” Then comes the expectation that the audience will find the verse absurd because stylistic compromises were made just to get a rhyming word in.

Well yeah….sometimes.

But that’s fine. In a writing exercise, you’re not seeking art or permanence. You’re chasing the muse, curious about where she leads. It’s almost disposable writing, which is not to say it’s worthless. To the contrary, it very well could end up in a finished work. But again, that’s not the point. The goal, the real objective, is to keep your writing tools honed. This makes your daily manuscript work easier because you’ve kept your mind sharp.

In the spirit of the Halloween season, I hope you can enjoy this little cautionary tale, written in the style of old nursery rhymes. Continue reading →

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Moving Full Speed At The Starting Line

This post is approximately 500 words.

As a writer, I’m continually looking for ways to say things differently: more concisely, more interestingly, and perhaps most importantly, in a way that you haven’t read before.

cartoon-elephant-skating-rollers-25462068.jpgOne of the more enjoyable ways to accomplish this is using analogies, a sometimes challenging exercise because a bad analogy will fall on its face like an elephant on roller skates.

Good, you’re still with me, despite what I just did there.

In the process of writing this book, I’ve found a new method to be more productive when I sit down at the computer. But before this morning, I didn’t have a way to convey it to others, at least not a satisfactory (i.e. interesting) one.

I suspect many writers are like me in this regard: we want our typing fingers moving top speed the moment we sit down to write. But – he said with a smile at this understatement – it’s hard. Ridiculously so on some days. Much time is wasted staring at the screen or typing the literary equivalent of “Me am good writer who tell good story.” As much as I despise the word can’t, sometimes a person can’t just sit down and start writing. Continue reading →

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Footsteps and raindrops

This post is approximately 350 words, some of them onomatopoetic.

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Life in the asphalt stars

I usually walk the dogs with music playing through headphones. One morning, as mist hung heavy upon the air, I decided to go without.

Diffuse light made determining the direction of the sun impossible, yet every tree, house, and bird enjoyed the kind of perfect illumination that sent photographers running for their cameras.

As I entered the park, and the maudlin noise of suburban life faded away, footsteps and raindrops the only sound to hear.

The split-splash, split-splash of soft dog paws in shallow puddles.

The sploosh-splush of my larger feet, the second step muffled by ripples from the first. Continue reading →

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Too Many Villains

This post is approximately 600 words.

In this post, you get to travel far down the rabbit hole. But instead of landing in Wonderland, you’ll land in the writer’s brain, a place as equally crazy and confusing.

rabbit hole.gif

As the title implies, I’ve got too many villains in my first book. At least, that’s the perception readers will have. If I’m careful enough – write well enough – I can prevent them from thinking that, but it’s complicated because I don’t want a simple black-and-white story.

In the mix, some win, lose, die, or are redeemed. Some characters might even be more than one of the following:

  • the antagonist of the entire series
  • the lieutenant – the character that does the bidding
  • the manipulator – the deceiver
  • the baron – the non-supernatural foil
  • the monster – in a traditional story, the dragon to be slayed
  • the foot soldiers – cannon fodder

For characters that come and go, interwoven amongst each other’s storylines within a twisty, turny story, it will be easy to lose my readers. In working through the second draft, I find I’m already there. Continue reading →

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That time I shared my writing #1

This post is approximately 550 words, and the first one I’ve written since August 31. For shame.

You know the old nightmare: the one where you’re standing in front of the class completely naked. That’s a doozy, right?

nightmare

I’ve often told friends I’d rather be naked in a crowd than share my writing. To their relief, I choose the latter. But it’s a similar fear: the thought of exposing your very real self, the part that almost no one ever sees. As a writer – and I’ve heard similar things from other aspiring novelists – I’m often in my head, examining and re-examining every single word that comes out, dreading that I’ve created something awful. That all the imperfections are spotlight-worthy. Perhaps unfairly so, but c’est la vie.

It’s paradoxical, right? You’re working on a book you want people to read, yet you’re scared of showing it to anyone. For me, I want a million people to read my book. Ambitious, optimistic, crazy? Yes to all the above. But I’ve got to show it to one person first. And hoo boy, that’s the painful struggle. Continue reading →

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Flash Fiction: An exercise in editing

This post is approximately 750 words, about as long as a typical flash fiction piece.

I discovered flash fiction a few summers ago. Seemed like the perfect way to churn out quick little stories that I didn’t want to flesh out further. I’m fan of O. Henry and fairy tales, both of which are often very short. For me, sometimes there wasn’t much story to tell, and that was fine. And with a word count of 500 to 1,000 words, it should be no problem cranking something out in less than an hour, especially for someone who’s been typing for more than half his life and finds himself bursting with ideas.

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So, oh yes, it was very easy to type quick stories: 1,200 words, 2,500 words, 5,000 words! How in the hashtag was I going to edit down stories of those lengths? Well, for the longer ones, I couldn’t. They would sit, untouched, until I had the time to flesh them out into longer short stories (the 5,000-word one has since doubled in length).

But the 1,200-worder posed a delightful challenge. I just needed to trim my story by 17% (yes, I’m an English major who likes math). That’s probably about what I should be looking to do with my writing anyways. In a story of this length, that was about two paragraphs. I reread the story, looking for a section to cut. And read it again. And again.

I was stuck.

Every paragraph seemed to drive the narrative forward. Every detail seemed critical. After all, why would I put in anything that wasn’t essential, especially when word count was a key consideration? I felt like I had laid a path with paving stones and was now trying to determine which ones to remove. At first glance, it seemed my smooth story would soon be filled with potholes.

All right. I’ll nickel and dime the heck out of it and see what that gets me. Continue reading →

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The Edges of Fantasy

This post is about 600 words.

Seven years ago, I was shoveling my driveway for the third time in twenty-four hours. A blizzard was sweeping across the upper Midwest, making up for the lack of snow we’d had that season. I was happy for its arrival. The snow, not the blizzard.

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My preferred method of winter transport. They smell bad on the outside.

I have a routine when clearing the driveway: first define the edges, then push the snow outwards from the middle. That day, it struck me as analogous to how I wrote fantasy fiction, which was different than the way I wrote everything else. I thought I needed to approach fantasy by rigidly defining all aspects of the world before filling in the storyline. I felt I needed to know the limitations of my realm, which really seems counter-intuitive for a story designed to exist completely outside our own reality. Here’s a quick list of the things I wanted to create first:

Races, political history, creation myths, alphabet and language, folklore, weapons, armor, architecture, landscapes and geography, clothing and fashion, fighting styles, music and poetry, racism, and heroic legends

That’s a monumental amount of detail to develop before the main character begins the Hero’s Journey. Even though some story ideas blossomed from this world-creation, I struggled getting to the serious writing before I’d defined every aspect of my new world. Until I’d found the edges.

Calvin 2.jpg

“In my rewrite, this shop is on another street!”

That’s the real reason I never got far in my original fantasy novel. But man, oh man, I really enjoyed defining those things, which is part of the trap, right? It’s exhilarating to play god in your own little world, even if the devil is in the details. I might have put down 100,000 words on paper, but more than half were notes and definitions and guidelines and rules, rules, rules.

Consequently, I abandoned that epic fantasy novel, despite having created several maps, dozens of characters, and components of everything else on my aforementioned list. It was the right decision. It was too big for me and was going to get in the way of the rest of my life.

I knew I would eventually return to this world when I was ready. Continue reading →

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Writing Exercise #2: Out of the Rain

This post is approximately 400 words.

Some people have a musical soundtrack that plays through their minds as they walk or run. I have this, too, but more often than not, I have narration. My head is filled with the story of what could happen to someone in my situation. Not so long ago, it was a rainy walk to work.

The first sentence is the exact first thing that came into my head as I stepped onto the sidewalk. The rest followed me as I went.

*     *     *     *     *

He walked unconcernedly through the rain. The quiet drizzle was a nice respite from the thunderous show of the night before. His umbrella echoed with rhythmic pit-pats as his shoes splashed through puddled evidence of the storm. All-in-all, he told himself, it was a nice change from his usual morning walk to work. A little variation in an otherwise monotonous journey he’d made hundreds of times in the last five years. People ran past with jackets over their heads or briefcases held high, but their attempts to stay dry were in vain. He allowed himself a smile, though it still took an effort to bring it to his lips.

It took a few moments for him to realize – at least, that’s what he would tell himself later when he tried to recall the exact series of events – that the sound of the rain against his umbrella had gone. His feet still splashed in puddles, but it seemed the rain had stopped. He lowered his umbrella, looking around, but still saw others trying to protect themselves against the wet. He stopped, thinking that he must be in some pocket of quiet, the eye of the storm where all was peaceful.

A sudden gale nearly blasted him off his feet, buffeting him and drenching his clothes. He had a momentary glimpse of his tattered umbrella before it disappeared into the gray of the sudden deluge. Then as suddenly as it had hit, it ceased. Again he was in the quiet in the midst of the storm. But it was different this time.

The rain still fell, but it no longer touched him.

*     *     *     *     *

I have no idea where this goes. And it doesn’t matter. It’s more fun that way.

–Michael

See also: Writing Exercise #1: Be Uninspired
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My bad writing day #1

This post is about 250 words. Note the #1 in the title. I expect many posts in this theme.

Yesterday was an all-around bad writing day: both at the office and in my personal life. My energy level was low. My creativity was non-existent. In fact, this post contains the uninspired remnants of the day. Fortunately, it’s short.

  • I needed to write some marketing copy. Nope.
  • I needed to work on my manuscript. Nope.
  • I needed to write a recommendation for someone. Nope.
  • I went to a go-to remedy for days like this: blogging. Big nope.

Most of what I wrote is garbage. Seriously. Here’s what it was like re-reading some of it this morning.

near vomit

Fortunately, years of writing have allowed me to jettison my ego when it comes to days like that. I’m willing to throw away every single word and start over. I’ve often found it takes more effort to fix uninspired writing than it does to simply begin again.

As such, the day was not a complete waste. As many have said before me, a person learns more from the failures than the successes. I learned (again) that days like this still occur regardless of how many thousands of hours I’ve spent on the craft.

Here are three helpful things to remember when you have a writing day like this:

  1. Bad writing does not equal a bad idea – go back to the heart of the idea
  2. Start fresh – don’t try to re-work garbage
  3. It always gets better – because it certainly can’t get worse!

Good luck and good writing!

–Michael

Enjoy what you just read? Leave a comment or like the post and we’ll ensure that you see more like this from Michael!

© Michael Wallevand, August 2016

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My awful query email

I’m currently researching literary agents, somewhat dreading the query emails I’ll need to write because of the perfection they require. Yes, yes, I know agents are people, too. But the query needs to be perfect because I’m trying to sell these people my baby.

Wait…that came our wrong.

Anyways, here is how my mind exaggerates my queries into weirdly desperate cries for help. Something like this:

beggingTo Whom It May Concern:

Thank you for taking the time to read this query. I found your listing while searching for an agent to represent my fantasy novel, The Princess and the To-Be-Named Important Event.

This is going to be painful. My apologies in advance. This submission represents my first attempt to gain agent representation, as well as my first attempt to become a published author. I have no idea how to write a query email. I’ve written thousands of business letters and scores of cover letters, so you can expect this email to be well-written and typo-free. But when it comes to begging for your service, I’m lost. Continue reading →