It’s very easy in a job – in any job – to get hung up on all the things you’d love to change. Or to get dragged into negativity when simple commiseration with colleagues descends into toxic complaint sessions. Having worked in a wide variety of roles, including food processing, lab assistant, retail, and several corporate jobs, I can attest that it happens everywhere.

My work division (FindLaw, a part of Thomson Reuters) is being sold to another company, and the watercooler talk runs the gamut of perspectives and opinions, which means if we’re not careful, we could spiral into endless negativity. The stress is high, and many have an irrational fear of the unknown.

What’s helpful for me, and what I’m recommending to all my mentees, is a pros/cons list. It perhaps sounds cliché, but it’s still incredibly effective. While pay, merit increases, and advancement opportunities are important, they’re not the reason I stay with a company. For me, a flexible working schedule is paramount.

My younger son, Benji, has severe autism. Sleep is a recurring issue for him. Some nights, he’s just awake. He’s somehow powered through his nighttime meds and can’t fall asleep again. One night becomes two becomes a week or more. There’s a compounding effect to this, meaning some of his behaviors are worsened, which creates difficulties at school or elsewhere in public. There have been days where I have to drop everything and run to school to bring him home.

At a recent social hour at the office, several colleagues asked how our family was doing.

I took comfort knowing that so many people had been following our story and cared enough to ask. In addition to providing the latest update, I also shared my gratitude. One of the first things I mentioned was Thomson Reuters’s hybrid working philosophy.

I explained all the different places I’ve been able to work. On his bedroom floor in the middle of the night. In the bathroom. At the emergency room. In my car in a parking lot. At various neighborhood coffee shops when I’m working on 2 hours’ sleep. At Barnes & Noble as I chase a manic teenager around the store. I’m also able to vary my work hours and even make time for a nap when I’m beyond exhausted.

Two reactions from my colleagues continue to gratify me. First, upon hearing the full extent of our situation and how erratic my work schedule had been (I might have 4 or 5 work sessions in a day, starting at 2am and ending at midnight), they were amazed as they realized my work with them didn’t suffer. More importantly, it helped them consider and voice their own gratitude for this flexibility and other things, and we all felt better.

A flexible hybrid policy alone isn’t the only contributing factor, however. A person must truly understand how they best work in varying environments.

As a neurodiverse human, there was a time in my life when I would have struggled with such a lack of structure. When I worked for Best Buy, they provided excellent instruction on how to be successful working from, literally, anywhere. Part of this was on the employee to be self-driven and responsible, while a greater part of the onus was on the manager, who needed to set clear objectives and hold teams accountable. I brought five years’ experience in that environment when I joined FindLaw/Thomson Reuters in 2010, and when my son’s sleep issues began in 2018, I was better prepared than many might have been.

That’s not to say I’m capable of managing any of this alone. In addition to my incredible wife, awesome older son, fantastic future daughter-in-law, and our families, we have a wonderful support network. And at the office, when you’ve expended a ton of energy to create a team environment, it makes every aspect of your job easier.

Additionally, my former manager, Ray, was unbelievingly compassionate and accommodating for my erratic schedule over the summer. My colleagues Becky and Bebi have spent the last 18 months helping keep projects moving or taking ownership of sub-initiatives so I can focus on the primary body of work.

I anticipate my son’s sleep struggles will be lifelong, which means work flexibility will always be my primary consideration when it comes to getting a new job, pursuing a promotion, or leaving a company. As such, we have been extremely blessed that my current role has such a benefit, and it had compelled me to stay at Thomson Reuters, even through the challenging periods of work.

In closing, I’ll add one final thought. Expressing your gratitude has benefits not just for yourself, but for those around you. It’s an important thing for an author to consider when it comes to beta readers, people who buy your work, writing colleagues, and those who voice their support for your art. Don’t be one of those people who thinks they achieved things solely on their own. No one does.

Good luck with your writing!

Mike

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